Vajazzling, the art of making your hoo-haa pretty…

Vajazzling; it’s one of those words that I could say again and again, like an annoying toddler, because it’s a cool word. But what does it mean? Do you know what Vajazzling is?

I attended a party recently where the topic came up – ok, I brought the topic up because we were talking about getting our bikini lines waxed and it seemed like a logical progression in the conversation. That’s why I love my friends – we talk about this kind of stuff all the time without embarrassment.

Anyhoo, here is the definition of Vajazzling, according to Wiktionary:

A cosmetic treatment in which jewels are placed on a woman’s vulva and/or pubic area. The area must first be waxed – a Brazilian.

This definition pleased me, mostly because it allowed me to finally figure out which part was the Vulva.  In another post,  (The Only Vulva in the House),  I wrote about how my seven year old son came home from school and informed me that, because of the sexual education they had received that day, he knew that  I had a Vulva.

This wasn’t exactly news to me – I also knew that I had a Vulva. I just had no idea of where it was. According to this definition, and pictures I found, the Vulva is actually what I had always thought was the Vagina – your Vagina is actually the inside bit, the Vulva is the outside bit – the front bum. Fascinating.  So glad my seven year old son was instrumental in helping me figure this out.

And here’s a picture to demonstrate-

vaj 1

And no, unfortunately the abs and butt don’t come with the Vajazzling. You must bring your own.

Of course, there are many designs – from the extreme to the more delicate…

vaj

But Vajazzing isn’t merely decorating your hoo-haa with pretty crystals. No! You can decorate your hoo-haa with so much more. Adornments include:

Feathers…

There are various design templates for Vajazzling with feathers as well.

Why not try the Carnivale?

carnivale-bikini-wax  Carnivale-

Adorning your hoo-haa with feathers is probably not recommended for those planning a holiday in which a Bikini will be worn – unless you’re open to sharing your prettiness with onlookers.

Fur…

 (this one has me confused. Isn’t the reason we pour hot wax onto our girly bits and then rip our pubic hairs out by the roots so that we don’t have any furry bits?).

fur vaj

Mind you, I am pretty sure that this is not an accurate depiction of the fur kind of Vajazzle. I could be wrong, but it’s just a hunch.

And for the men? Why should they be left out? They have what’s called….Penazzling. Yep, another great name. Unfortunately (well, maybe not) I couldn’t find any pictures of Penazzling that wouldn’t require me to change the rating on the entire blog – but you can use your imagination. The same rules apply – a good Brazilian prior to the bejewelling.

For those who don’t want to Vajazzle, they can apply a temporary tattoo – called a (you guessed it)…a Twatoo or a Vatoo.

va-ttooing_m-200x200

Of course, you can always either trim your way to romance, using various stencils that will allow you to ‘trim the bush’ into a particular shape…

grooming

Or you can dye your pubic hair (and perhaps trim as well) if you so wish…who wouldn’t like hot pink or orange pubes?

betty_banner

But before you get all turned off by the above, spare a thought as to how women used to ‘manicure’ themselves in the past…

In the 16th Century, women would grow their pubic hair long and decorate it with bows. Nice.

In ancient Rome, women would get rid of the hair using a pumice stone, various chemicals and even fire! (Suddenly waxing doesn’t seem so bad!).

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6 thoughts on “Vajazzling, the art of making your hoo-haa pretty…

  1. Alli S says:

    You make me laugh! Love it! And yeah, I feel so much better now I have more knowledge about vajazzling and penazzling (they are cool words, huh?). 🙂

  2. Zoe Kennedy says:

    😂😂😂😂😂what a classic…

  3. […] a year ago I did a blog on Vajazzing- the art of making your hoo-haa pretty. Who would have thought that it would be consistently the most viewed post on my entire […]

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